Destined To Completely Become Mistress Alyssa's Fetish Smoking SissyGirl

Even when I drop off the path of feminization and sissification for a few days, I find that I can't keep myself from finding my way right back to that path.  I have smoked 8 cigarettes today, and I will smoke more.  I can't wait to do my smoking video while dressed for my Mistress Alyssa.  Something weird has happened.  I have started sucking my thumb when I go to bed---and thinking that i am sucking of Mistresss Alyssa's cock.  I re-painted my toenails today.  They are so shiny now.  I'm thinking of putting another coat on them to make them even shinier.  I am using the clear coat.  I have not made love to my wife in a while.  Smoking is now sex for me and smoking has replaced sex with my wife.  I increasingly don't need her.  She is in the way of my becoming the complete Fetish Smoking Sissy Girl and in belonging to Mistress Alyssa.  I find that I need to speak to Mistress Alyssa.  Speaking to her is like taking crack to me.  I have come to need it.  Need it more and more.