Hiya

chloe hear.  I gess i dont rite real wel, so dont hold dat aganst me.  Im havin beter ten sex smokin on my vs 120s.  dey make me feel soooo goooed!  now if i jes can find a cock 2 suk!

Girl Named Chloe Taking Over My Dreams

In my dreams last night, I was a girl named Chloe.  She (me?) was pretty wild.  Just wanted to have sex and smoke.

Went shopping for shoes yesterday, but didn't have much time so wasn't able to find what I want.  Did make me feel awfully girly.  I need a closet that I can fill up with shoes.  I wake up every morning now sucking my thumb.  And now I'm starting to suck it during the day without thinking about it.  My mind goes blank as I suck my thumb and than I just feel pleasure and a strong compulsion to keep sucking on it.  And than, I want to smoke.

A Girl Needs To Shop for Shoes

I think someone else has been using my blog. 

I'm feeling so girly and arroused smoking a delicious Virginia Slim 120 and wearing a silky sheer blouse, silky black pants, nylons and a slip and bra---just no panties! I love being submissive and owned by Mistress Alyssa, as i am her fetish smoking sissy girl.  My addictions for smoking and dressing are growing I think.  I need to do some shopping today----mmmmmm shop for some sexy femme heels, maybe boots too.  A girl needs to have her shoes.  I just feel so eroticised here smoking and being so silkly dressed.  I don't seem to have much of a will anylonger when Mistress Alyssa talks to me.  I want to please her so much, and do whatever she tells me.  I want to open my mind up and just let her fill up my head with all her thoughts and what she wants me to think.    Everything else seems to not mean much anymore. Just being Mistress Alyssa's fetish smoking sissy girl.

chloe here

hi em chloe, and i hopes this chick melinda dont mind me writin hear fur her.  I em bimbo grirl who luvs to smoke and to suk cocks and have sex.  I hope i can do this a lot.  i luv to dress so femme and slutty and sexy and want a cock soon.  smokin write now.  hop im basck later

Off Xmas Shopping

Last minute Xmas shopping.  I have on my silky sheer magenta blouse over a smooth nylon black slip and lacy black bra, with satiny black nylon brief panties, silky shimmery nylon stockings with a lacy garter, and a magenta silky mid-length skirt, wearing make up, a long cute sexy wig, and shiny red lipstick.  Well, this is how I wanted to dress to go shopping.  I guess I am buying some boring things, but I might have to pick up some things for me---I'm such a naughty girl, but I think I deserve some femme things!  Don't you?  I really might need to start doing mail order---so much easier.  If my Mistress Alyssa decides to send me one, maybe I'll have a nice guy under misletoe who I can kiss!  Wish my Mistress was here to kiss---I would kiss her all over.  Her lips, the tip of her cock, mmmmmm.  As I enjoyed a smokey treat, Virginia Slim 120-----oooooooo, PLeasure, mmmm.  Need to be careful, I will put myself in a trance.  Well, I should put some more Virginia Slim 120s in my so feminine silver cigarette case so I can take them with me shopping.  Next year, I hope I will be completely girlied up to go Xmas shopping-----giggle, giggle.

No Panties Wednesday

Even though my feminization may have slowed down somewhat, I still had my No Panties Wednesday.  Actually I wore thigh high nylon hose, a silky cami and put more polish on my toenails.  Hoping to find all sorts of sissy clothes, makeup, lingerie and new butt plug under the tree at Christmas, but i don't think Santa got my list.  Boohoo

Computer Borrowed

Alyssa's Fetish smoking sissy girl (me!) not been on the computer last few days because lent it out to a friend.  He is also working on it.  Hope to have it back soon.  Want to wear a silk and satin red dress for my Mistress Alyssa on Christmas morning and tenderly awake her by sucking on her cock and serving her breakfast.

Overslept

Had meant to get up early so maybe I would be fortunate enough to be able to speak to my Mistress Alyssa.  I guess I slept in too late.  Maybe a little too much to drink last night.  Oooooie- I am such a sissy.  Smoking has made me feel even more dreamy like I just enjoy being a smoking sissy girl.  I think about sucking cocks but I am not excited anymore about fucking a woman.  Now, getting a cock in my rear sissy hole while im inhaling a sweet tasting Virginia Slim 120 would be very erotic.  Maybe my Mistress Alyssa will do this to me.  Maybe I could make a video with me doing this!  Laptop not working great.  I think i need a new router.  I need to spend more time with my Mistress Alyssa.  I am so much her fetish smoking sissy girl now.  I should replace my wedding ring with a sissy collar.  I am Mistress Alyssa's smoking sissy girl now, not a husband.

Not In Christmas Spirit

I feel just blasee about the holidays this year.  I can't feel excited if I'm not dressed in a red satin Christmas dress or a see through nylon blouse and taffeta skirt, over smooth nyloned legs, with bright red lipstick and able to be smoking a Virginia Slim 120.  And wish I was with my Mistress Alyssa during the holidays especially although I'm sure she is busy this time of year.  I felt even worse when i wasn't able to talk to Mistress Alyssa today.  But, I always feel bad now when I go very long without talking to her.  I wish I could just get on her schedule.  I wake up from dreams of Mistress Alyssa, usually with my thumb in my mouth and a nighty on in the middle of the night, but lately it has been too cold to get out of bed and see if she is on the net.  But, I feel restless when i don't talk to her.  Had a bunch of things to do today.  Wore panties and a cami, but really would have liked to keey my silky dress on that I first put on.  Trying to learn more about make up and lipstick.  For some reason, really feeling the urge to start wearing lipstick.  Was a bit distracted today, and I don't think I have smoked 8 cigarettes today.  Keeping my Virginia Slims in their pretty silver case.  Feel so feminine when i pull a cigarette out of it.Is time of year when people should be together, but I'm feeling lonely because I feel the need to be with people who know I am a fetish smoking sissy girl, and love me that way.  Maybe next Christmas!

No Longer the Man I Once Was

I actually no longer a man, if I ever was one.  I know now that i am a fetish smoking sissy girl.  I was a non-smoker who looked down on smokers and no I am a smoker that is hypnotized watching other girls smoke.  I no longer can stand wearing the cotton boxer shorts I used to wear.  I now wear silky nylon or satiny panties.  I wear shiny clear nail polish on my toes, and i keep thinking of wearing shiny lipstick.  I sometimes wear a lacy bra, and I put on a lacy silky nylon slip as much as I dare, which is more and more.  I live to put on a silky sheer blouse and twirly chiffon skirt or a silky tight dress.  I catch myself swinging my hips when I walk.  And I keep thinking about how Im going to become even more femme.  I love sucking my Mistress Alyssa's cock and dream of her every night.  I am sleeping more and more in a nylon nighty and wake up sucking my thumb which seems like a cock to me.  And I seem to be smoking my delicious Virginia Slim 120s more and more.  Smoking cigarettes has become sex for me.  I dont need a wife anymore, I have my sexy VS 120s which give me so much bliss and pleasure.  And I slip into a trance after just a few deep inhales of my sexy feminine Virginia Slim 120s.  I know that soon I will be dressing, and doing a smoking video for my Mistress. 

Watched TV

I felt guilty watching the DVR recorded DEXTER episode  from Sunday night when I should have been studying make-up videos.  I need to learn to put on lipstick, because I am really wanting to start wearing it on my lips.  Well, maybe tomorrow  A bit tired tonight.  Got up in middle of night last night because I heard my Mistress Alyssa calling me.  I want to be with her all the time now.  I'm sure she was busy with the things she needs and chooses to do.  I am her mere submissive fetish smoking sissy girl.  Busy at work is keeping me from really going under as a submissive smoking girl.  But, the transformation is taking place.  Always looking for ways to speed the metemorphis into that smoking sissy girl.

Felt Horny All Day

Couldn't stop feeling horny all day.  Couldn't concentrate at work.  Just wanted to smoke because that gives me so much bliss and sexual satisfaction.  Kept swishing and acting girly because I felt so girly.  Was looking to buy lipstick, but was confused what to buy.  Also realized that if I put it on my lips, it might not all come off?  Thinking more and more that I need a few days to live as a fetish smoking sissy girl being with my Mistress Alyssa on Skypa or IM with my cam on.  Will be all her smoking sissy girl after that.  Have to find a cute long wig first.  I will put on some makeup, a silky dress, my cute long wig and do a smoking video for my Mistress.

My Mind Has Gotten Hazy

I still remember a time when I used to think things through.  Where I had a sense of planning what I was doing.  But, now I just seem to act by the needs and thoughts that appear in my head.  I think about needing that next delicious Virginia Slim 120 cigarette.  And how much bliss i feel when I smoke one.  And how erotic and sexy and feminine I feel dressing in silky sheer feminine clothes, and how much I need to dress more and more that way.  And how i love feeling so submissive and obeying my Mistress Alyssa.  Other thoughts do still come into my head that I am taking these things too far, that soon it will be all who I am.  But, those thoughts have become very hazy, and I can't seem to bring them into focus anymore.  I do at times start thinking about what I am doing, but so easy to let those thoughts go.  So pleasureful just to allow myself to follow my needs that I dont even need to think about.  I started this blog starting to focus on that maybe i need to slow all this feminization down, but I looked at my pack of Virginia Slim 120s----and they were so sexy so inviting, I needed to take one out to look at it.  I had thought about testing myself not to smoke 10 cigarettes, but why would I do that?  They call to me.  I want to have a sexy Virginia Slim 120 between my lips all the time.

Pretty Silver Cigarette Case

I was over at a shopping center today, and I suddenly had an overwhelming urge to go into a Smoke Shop I was walking past.  It was if my legs had a mind of their own.  I walked into the shop and found myself explaining to the shop owner that I needed a silver case for Virginia Slim 120s.  He found me a shiny, pretty feminine one and I felt a little thrill to see a rose engraved on its cover.  I knew I had to have it.  I also got a little giddy to see so many packages of VS 120s on the wall.  I asked him which ones were the strongest, but I dont think he knew.  I ended just getting a pack of the same Virginia Slim 120s that I always do, even though I already still have half a pack left.  Just felt good to buy more.  And now I have the beautiful silver cigarette case.  I stared at the case, almost feeling like I was in a trance.  But, I know i am such a good hypnosis subject.  I'm not sure why I know this, I just do.  And I am feeling increasingly under hypnosis.  I just am always feeling so submissive and open and following things i dont even know how they popped into my head. 

Woke Up This Morning In My Nighty And Confused

This morning, I woke up and found that I was still wearing my filmy silky magenta baby doll nighty and matching panties.  I also realized that I was wearing a bra.  I at first couldn't remember where I was.  My mind was in a fog.  And I had my thumb in my mouth sucking away---and I was dreaming it was a cock!I thought I was a girl (well I am a girl---but not one pretending to be a guy), and maybe I was with someone whose cock I needed to suck.   Well, no cock there! Just my thumb, but that felt so blissful to suck on.  In and out, tongue circling it.  Damn!  Hurried out of bed so wife would not see me, thinking that I should not be living here anymore.  Went outside and broke out a delicious sexy, feminine Virginia Slim 120.  Since a couple of days ago when I spoke with my Mistress Alyssa, I have fallen further under the craving to smoke----I feel drugged when I smoke.  The long sexy Virginia Slim 120s make me feel so feminine, so girly, so submissive, so much like I am transforming into Mistress Alyssa's fetish smoking sissy girl.  Its all I want to be now.  Mostly what I think about.  i live for when I can talk to her, and can't wait to see what she is going to do to me next.  And I just have the feeling now that I can and should tell her everything about me.  I just want to show how much she owns me, controls me, is molding me into the fetish smoking sissy girl that i need to completely transform into.  I have a feeling that Im acting and thinking more like a girl without even realizing it. 

Virginia Slim 120s Give Me Bliss

I have started to worship my Virginia Slim 120s.  They have become my addiction.  I want to keep them in a very special place so I am looking for a very special silver case to keep them in.  People keep asking me what has changed with me.  I think perhaps because I am acting so much like a girl the past couple of days.  I'm not completely sure because I'm only doing what feels natural to me.  I can hardly stand to wear boy clothes anymore.  Got a dress in the mail, and it took all my will power not to go put it on and show everyone the girl i am.  I want to find a feminine transformation service so I can show how completely feminized i am now to my Mistress Alyssa.  I want to get a hotel room for a couple of days to smoke and dress and talk to my Mistress Alyssa.  After that I will be completely addicted to smoking, dressing, and obeying Mistress Alyssa.  Maybe that will be the time to move out/

Ordered A Dress-Want More

Been so busy lately.  Had a cold too.  Was smoking 8 cigarettes a day, but slowed down while feeling bad.  Feeling better now.  Do I move forward on smoking to really establish a smoking addiction?  My need to have dresses addiction is growing.  Ordered a silky disco dress although I don't know how I'm going to sneak it past wife.  Let alone where to keep it.  Really want lots of silky dresses (and silky blouses and silky skirts) hanging in full view in my closet.  Have been having dreams of sucking my Mistress Alyssa's penis, than wake up and I'm sucking my thumb.  When did I start sucking my thumb>!!!  Wear a silky nighty to bed a lot too.  Being careful to hide from wife, but it starts to become so much me that I forget I'm wearing one, and might get careless.   Actually looked at an apartment thinking that I might want a new place to live.  Walked into the apartment office without thinking about it, and realized, "what am I doing?  Am I really this far down the road?!"  Wish Mistress Alyssa knew someone I could live with.  Actually really wish I could live with Mistress Alyssa!  Still working on finding make up.  Not sure what is going to happen if I start wearing make up.  But, i wear nylon panties mostly---exscept today---its No Panties Wednesday!  I'll wear thigh high nylons (need some silky ones) and a camisole.  I could wear lots of lingerie on cold day like this.

Ordered A Dress

Ordered a smooth silky polyester dress.  Was also going to order a second very sheer black silk one, but they were out.  I want to fill my closet with silky slippery smooth dresses, skirts and blouses.  No more shirts and pants.  Maybe i should start looking for an apartment or a room.  Anyone out there have a room to rent or a house to share?

Destined To Completely Become Mistress Alyssa's Fetish Smoking SissyGirl

Even when I drop off the path of feminization and sissification for a few days, I find that I can't keep myself from finding my way right back to that path.  I have smoked 8 cigarettes today, and I will smoke more.  I can't wait to do my smoking video while dressed for my Mistress Alyssa.  Something weird has happened.  I have started sucking my thumb when I go to bed---and thinking that i am sucking of Mistresss Alyssa's cock.  I re-painted my toenails today.  They are so shiny now.  I'm thinking of putting another coat on them to make them even shinier.  I am using the clear coat.  I have not made love to my wife in a while.  Smoking is now sex for me and smoking has replaced sex with my wife.  I increasingly don't need her.  She is in the way of my becoming the complete Fetish Smoking Sissy Girl and in belonging to Mistress Alyssa.  I find that I need to speak to Mistress Alyssa.  Speaking to her is like taking crack to me.  I have come to need it.  Need it more and more.