Dear Diary

Was a very girly No Panty Wednesday.  Just because it felt so natural to be girly.  I can't tell where I'm going or where I will end up, but so often in a bit of a daze that it doesn't really seem to matter.  Losing interest in working, in paying attention to my wife, and all the things which used to be my life.  More and more I just want to wear something silky and feminine; and to see how girly I can become.  And of course, becoming an addicted sissy smoking girl.  Paying attention to how i smoke--- how to hold my cigarette, looking feminine and sexy doing it. And talking to my Mistress Alyssa.  Those are the things that have become important to me.  I might need to retire and get divorced soon the way I am going.