Moving Closer To Divorce

I'm not sure divorce is what I want, but I don't think my wife will accept the sissy feminine fetish smoking girl i am increasingly becoming.  I have been sleeping in a separate bedroom and wearing nylon nighties to bed.  I wear nylon panties instead of cotton boxers, nylon hos instead of socks, camisoles and slips instead of t-shirts, and often a bra.  Increasingly, heels are replacing my men shoes.  I have started to wear blouses at home.  And although she realizes that i am smoking, she thinks i only smoke a little and she is really pushing me to quit smoking.  And I love Mistress Alyssa and not her.  I want to start trying makeup and maybe even hormones.  I got a debit card so i can order from Birch place a sissy dress, mincers, a sissy collar and sissy panties.  I crave being a smoking sissy girl.  I dont think there is anyway i could stop my now steady progression into becoming a complete girl.  Everytime now i talk to Mistress Alyssa I go deeper under her control.  I dont know what Mistress Alyssa has planned for me, but i am now ready to do everything she decides for me.  I want her to completely brainwash me so I only think what she puts into my head.