Wife Said I'm Acting Like A Girl

Wife told me that I have been acting like a girl lately.  My mannerisms, the way I walk, the way I talk.  She said that even some of my clothes are looking feminine.  She said that we need to re-connect.  I bought some new men's pj bottoms that were silky nylon, and she hated them.  Little she know that I actually wanted to wear a silky nightie instead with panties.  I have been trying to be more of a guy around her, but it hasn't felt right.  I just feel confused, and keep dreaming about my Mistress Alyssa.  Wife has also told me that she doesn't want me smoking cigarettes.  I don't smoke in front of her, but I am trying to stop although having a delicious Virginia Slim 120 gives me so much bliss.  Maybe I need to give up my wife instead of dressing and cigarettes---I am trying to do what she says, and my submissive side has started to give into her.  But, anytime i see a woman (or t-girl) smoking a cigarette, I want to be them.  And I lapse into a trance if I stare at a silky dress or sheer blouse and silky skirt for very long.  Been so busy lately, that not so much time to be tempted by smoking and dressing, but I know I could go back to it stronger than ever if I re-exposed myself to dressing and smoking.  I had started to think about divorce before wife re-asserted herself so I know it would be so easy to just give into being transformed into a complete fetish smoking sissy girl.  I have to even avoid thinking about it too much, let alone looking at pictures of fetish smoking sissies.  I have found that I have really been enjoy sucking on my thumb.  I fantasize that I'm sucking on a cock.