Leaving You For A Few Days

I'm getting very used to coming here everyday, but I'm going to be gone for a few days.  It's a little freaky for me to be away--- I feel like I need to be here trying to be more a girl everyday, even though I think I'll have fun where I'm going.  But, I'm at a point that if I'm not being girly, I don't feel good.  Hmmm---well I guess I'll have to be some girly while I'm away.  And, I am sooo going to be more a sissy smoking girl when i get back! Giggle...Of course, my smokes go with me.  Maybe I need to become a 2-pack a day girl when i get back?  And, my Sissy dress will be here soon after I get back, and than we shall really see if my sissy girl inside comes out more and takes over.  I know my head will be swirling with wondering where I am going to go with things after I get back.

Almost forgot to say how really sweet it is to be a girl on No Panty Wednesday!  I just had to use just a smudge of lipstick ---just because I felt so feminine... giggle.  And I slipped on my heels on in my office and left them on all the while I was in there.  They just felt so perfect.  I'm still getting used to wearing them, but I think they will become natural---even necessary to wear if I keep wearing them.

Well, all you ladies and girls---don't think any guys are reading this (although they could), and I think my diary is a girl, too, aren't you sweetie?  I should probably be getting ready for bed.  Still wearing my nighty under my guy pj's but maybe soon that will change.  Maybe time to squeeze a delicious Virginia Slim 120 in---mmmm PLEASURE---they give me so much happiness.

Ready To Order Sissy Dress

I went to my credit union and put money into a debit card to use to order the Mimi Satin Sissy Dress from www.thesissystore.com.  Also getting the matching petticoat, matching sissy girl satin pink panties, the Sissy Collar and Cuffs set, locks, and Mincing Ribbons.  I just hope i put enough money on the card.  The only thing that might hold me up ordering now is that I'm going out of town on Thursday through the weekend, and i might want to wait till im back.  Also the debit card takes 24 hours to activate.  But, the dress will soon be on the way to me.  I'm so excited about the dress, but also nervous some.  I am just partly anxious that my sissification (and maybe feminization too) will take a big step after the dress is with me.  Well, maybe I'll just have a sweet Virginia Slim 120 because the creamy white smoke just makes all my worries fade away as i smoke and i just care about being girly.

Just Letting The Cigarette Take Me To Girl Land

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Was Cold Here

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I keep Dressing More Girly

Wore a blouse today.  Wife saw me and gave me a funny look, but we really didn't talk or see each other much.  I found myself actually looking at adds for "Divorce!"  Am I moving to this?  I definitely am moving toward being a better girl everyday.  Wore just a hint of lipstick.  Am I moving more toward completely dressing everyday?  Was so frustrated!Was going to order the sissy dress, mincing ribbons, and sissy collar (pink and lacy!), but got stuck on working on taxes.  Ugh!  Expensive----going to have to pay!  Keeps popping in my head that I need a tatoo!  Really?  Yes!  But, not sure what I should get. Maybe that is too much of a dramatic change!  Mistress Alyssa is right (of course she is!).  I need another girl to smoke with.  Would be so much more fun to smoke with another girl.  Need to get my sissy dress, than take more steps in becoming a better girl.  Need to get there and than maybe Mistress will let me know where next I'm headed.

What Is My Next Step?

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Moving Closer To Divorce

I'm not sure divorce is what I want, but I don't think my wife will accept the sissy feminine fetish smoking girl i am increasingly becoming.  I have been sleeping in a separate bedroom and wearing nylon nighties to bed.  I wear nylon panties instead of cotton boxers, nylon hos instead of socks, camisoles and slips instead of t-shirts, and often a bra.  Increasingly, heels are replacing my men shoes.  I have started to wear blouses at home.  And although she realizes that i am smoking, she thinks i only smoke a little and she is really pushing me to quit smoking.  And I love Mistress Alyssa and not her.  I want to start trying makeup and maybe even hormones.  I got a debit card so i can order from Birch place a sissy dress, mincers, a sissy collar and sissy panties.  I crave being a smoking sissy girl.  I dont think there is anyway i could stop my now steady progression into becoming a complete girl.  Everytime now i talk to Mistress Alyssa I go deeper under her control.  I dont know what Mistress Alyssa has planned for me, but i am now ready to do everything she decides for me.  I want her to completely brainwash me so I only think what she puts into my head.